My Encounter With A Con-Artist

This one is hot off the presses, in fact I just got home from my encounter with a con-artist.

Me and Special K went to the gym to work out, this particular gym is in a crowded and expensive area of the city so there isn't anywhere to park except for the parking garage attached to the gym. Gym members don't have to pay for parking, all you do is take a ticket and validate it before you leave the gym, as long as you leave before two hours its free.

I pulled up to the garage ticket machine, rolled down my window and took a ticket when suddenly this skinny, blue eyed white girl jumped out and explained to me that she was stuck in the exit and couldn't leave for some complicated unexplainable reason. She offered that if I gave her my ticket so she could leave she would grab me a new ticket when I came back down to go into the gym, I made a quick decision and said, "sure why not". What do you expect I'm a nice guy!

As I drove up the ramp I turned to Special K and said, "how crazy would it be if this nice, innocent looking white girl ripped me off?" No worries though because when I came down she was still there but arguing with the Nigerian garage attendant. He was rambling about God knows what but I couldn't understand him. When he walked away mumbling to himself I turned to the girl and said, "OK how are we going to do this". She handed me 9 dollars to pay for the parking, said thank you and then ran to her car. No problem right? Wrong, I still didn't have a ticket. Before I could catch the girl to ask, she was gone! So I walked up to the garage office to talk to our Nigerian friend...

Yours Truly: Excuse me, how do I get a ticket for the garage?

Nigerian: You gave your ticket to that girl! You have to pay the full price!

Yours Truly: OK no problem, how much is it, 9 dollars?

Nigerian: No its 28 dollars!

Yours Truly: WHAT!!! Are you crazy, I just got here, I haven't been here for even 10 mins!

Nigerian: No ticket, I must charge you the full fee!

Yours Truly: Listen Shaka Zulu, I'm not giving you 28 dollars, you can lick my butt!

I guess he didn't like me calling him Shaka Zulu because he picked up his walkie talkie and called security on me. In less than 20 seconds two security guards with toy badges run up and act like they are going to beat me up.

Yours Truly: Listen guys, I'm not paying 28 dollars, I just got here.

Security Jerk #1: Well where is your ticket?

Yours Truly: I gave it to that girl, I was just trying to help her out, but this guy saw me I've only been here for 1o mins.

Security Jerk #1: I'm sorry but if you don't have a ticket you have to pay full price.

Security Jerk #2: That's what you get for being nice to people.

What an asshole! After arguing for 15 mins I realize there is nothing I can do so I give up, tell the guards, "have a nice day" and walk to the Basketball court where I find Special K and explain the story.

Yours Truly: Can you believe that!? 28 dollars!!!!

Special K: That sucks for you.

Yours Truly: I'm going to come here every single day and I'm going to find that girl and when I do I'm going to get my money back!

Special K: You should hit her with a dumbbell. Once they sign that waiver they cant sue if they get hurt with the equipment.

Yours Truly: What are drunk or something, that's assault you idiot!

Special K: Its your money.

Yours Truly: You're right, maybe I should punch her in the eye and yell, "wheres my money".

I couldn't believe I got hustled by this innocent looking white girl. Suddenly here comes the same girl walking up to me!

Yours Truly: Hey your the girl who ripped me off!

Innocent looking girl: I'm so sorry, I drove all the way home and then I realized you don't have a ticket so I came back to find you.

Yours Truly: Yea they want to charge me 28 dollars!

Innocent looking girl: Oh my God I'm so sorry.

Yours Truly: Yea that Nigerian dude was going nuts, he even called security on me.

Innocent looking girl: I'm so sorry...

Then there was a pause, she was looking at me really funny. I thought maybe I had a booger hanging out of my nose or something.

Innocent looking girl: Wait, where are you from?

Yours Truly: I'm from Egypt, why?

Innocent looking girl: No way. Kilou el nas arab wella shou? (in Arabic: everyone is Arab or what) I'm from Syria.

Yours Truly: Unbelievable, I get ripped off by an innocent looking white girl and she turns out to be an innocent looking Syrian girl.

Finally we go to an ATM machine where she takes out money to even everything out. It turns out she was 2 mins over the 2 hour time limit and didn't want to pay 9 dollars. I hate cheap Arabs. She felt so miserable about having to pay 28 dollars instead that she insisted we go back to the Nigerian guy to explain everything in hopes of only having to pay 9 dollars. We went back to the office, apologized and evened it all out, she paid 9 dollars and he gave me a new ticket. What an idiot this girl is, stressed out and almost an hour later she still ended up paying 9 stinking dollars. Unbelievable, and what are the chances she would be Arab? At least she came back.

On the way home Special K turns to me and says.....

Special K: Are you ever going to help someone again?

Yours Truly: No, never!

Special K: Good, I'm glad you learned your lesson.