Oh God, The Irony!

So I lied, there was a drop in publishing but not because I don't have internet, I hacked into a connection as soon as I got here. The drop in publishing is due to me being thoroughly exhausted! Yesterday me and my friend Q ball moved in the last of my things, it was an all day event and we were ready to pass out, we were hot and sweaty and thirsty so I opened the fridge out of curiosity and found a box of beer, I looked up to the heavens and said, "is this a blessing in disguise?" Disguised by the fact that I don't like beer or alcohol really but as I stood there staring at the bottles I remembered every beer commercial I had ever seen, I remembered all those faces of sweat transformed into refreshness by ice cold bottles of beer. Was it true, could this yellow, piss flavored liquid quench my thirst? I popped one open, threw another to Q ball and poured the fizzy contents into my mouth. Take it from me, if your hot and sweaty and in need of refreshment, go ahead and drink a beer because it was delicious. I sat there on the couch in astonishment as if I was breathing air for the first time.

Later on I heard a knock at the door. I answered the door, it was my new neighbor who wanted to say hello and ask if I needed anything so I had him grab a couple things from the car and move them in. I guess he was trying to be a good neighbor because after that he invited me over. We stepped over to his place and as he opened his door a HUGE billow of smoke came rolling out but he just walked right through it as if wasn't there. Then the smell hit me...Weed! I turned to my new neighbor and said, "is this your home or Snoop Dogg's tour bus?" What luck I have, I sincerely HATE pot heads! Anyways, he gave me the tour and introduced me to his completely roasted friends, then I paused, looked around and realized, oh my God these guys are Arab! "Is this really happening to me, can't I escape these people!?" A Palestinian guy, a Lebanese guy and some others, the rest were Pakistani which aren't Arabs but close enough for the purposes of this post.

So here I am standing in the middle of a smoke filled room amongst a bunch of A-rabs, with "ALLAH" inscribed on the wall in Arabic. I want to be a good neighbor though so I look at my neighbor and his friends and say, "thanks for your help, I have plenty of beer, do you want some?" A guy with a joint in his mouth looks at me and says, "no man, we don't drink!" I look at him and say, "right, right, because alcohol is haram (a sin), I should know better"...........Oh God, the irony!